Sandpaper

So as I sat down to write this, I heard a random grunting noise and saw my husband’s feet flying past my face. This didn’t make any since to me, since we were working on our laptops side by side at Andrew’s homework desk. It turned out that he was leaning back on his chair (you know the way we always tell little kids not to do because they’ll fall and crack their skull) and he thought that his knee would catch on the desk and stop him from falling backward to his doom. Unfortunately he largely over estimated the catchablitiy of his knee. As he was falling to the floor he twisted around and put out his hands to stop himself (thus the grunting noise I heard) and though he was able to stop his upper body from crashing to the floor his lower body kept going (and we have his feet flying past my head). All in all, he somehow didn’t die and landed upright in his chair with me trying to get a breath in between my laughs.
Andrew and I have had so much fun over this Christmas break. Since the last break we had from school he started playing Diablo II with some of his friends from back in FL. I thought that it was good that he kept in touch with his friends from home but after a while I became jealous of this stupid game and how much time he was taking in “keeping in touch” with his friends. At the end of the break I warned him that if he spent that much of his time over Christmas break playing that game that I would crash his computer (I can wreck any form of electronic just by touching it, it’s a gift I guess…) He knew that I would hold true to the warning and he and I have found more crazy adventures to go on this break than I thought possible! It’s been so much fun! Like the other day I was getting stuff for the salon in my distributor store and I saw that they had a Tan Towel gift set that included the Tan Towel Original, the Tan Towel Exfoliator , and the Instant Tan Spray. My mother in-law had introduced me to the Tan Towel Original while I was in FL and I saw really good results with them. I would just rub this towelette on my skin and it was tan! Not orange but tan. I bought the gift set and figured Andrew and I could try it the next day. We have both lost all pigment in our skin due to the below freezing weather and lack of time to hit up a tanning bed. The next day I skimmed the step by step instructions and went to work. First was the exfoliator. We were supposed to rub this towelette all over the areas we wanted tanned to remove the top layer of skin so that the tan would sink in better. I went first. This towelette was like grade 8 sandpaper! I think I was rubbing a little too hard because some parts of me arms looked as if I had been a scratching post for cats. Then I helped Andrew. I think I rubbed a little too hard on him too because he started screaming and jumping away from me. By the end of the exfoliation we found that the instructions said gently rub skin with towelette, not grind away till you see bone. Andrew was pretty bitter at me for missing that minor detail. Next was the Tan Towel Original. We were to rub this towelette on our skin in circular motions to insure an even tan. I went first again and this towelette felt much nicer than the last one, although it did smell vaguely of beef jerky. Andrew handled this better too and it put us both in the mood for steaks. And last was the Instant Tan Spray. I had gotten bored with reading instructions by this point so I just went at it. I started squirting this stuff all over my body and to my horror I looked as though an angry Chinese food place had attacked me with soy sauce! I franticly rubbed it in and found that I was no longer white but a beach body bronze. WOW! It was amazing! I squirted Andrew down and I hardly recognized him. It was beautiful what this stuff did to our skin! Then I looked down at my hands… In hindsight I should have washed my hands between the Tan Towel I had used on myself, the one I’d used on Andrew, the spray I had used on myself, and the spray that I’d used on Andrew. My hands were now three times as tan at the rest of my body! BA! I scrubbed for twenty minutes and finally got my hands to match the rest of my body. But holy cow were we tan and so in the mood for some red meat!
A few days later Rexburg was hit with a freak snow storm. We had at least six inches of new heavy wet snow in our driveway. There was no way were going to be able to get Toothless (our car) out. We were snowed in or snowed under, take your pick. Our neighbor who normally plows us out in times like these was out of town. So Andrew called them and asked if he could borrow their four-wheeler with the plow attached to the front to clear out our driveway. They said yes and Christmas started all over for that man. He jumped on and went to work clearing out the neighbor’s driveway so that they could get in when they came home. I grabbed a snow shovel and shoveled off their walk way. By the time I was done with that I was ready to be finished with the shovel for a long time. Another neighbor was storing my dad’s tractor in their barn. Not to brag, but I’m amazing on that thing. I’d have our driveway cleaned out in no time flat. I called up my neighbor and had Andrew drive me over on the four wheeler. For some reason when we got to their house my neighbors didn’t think that I could handle such a heavy duty piece of equipment and wanted to clear the driveway out themselves. I was in shock. This offer would have been nice if I was an idiot city girl who didn’t know how to maneuver a tractor. But I’m freaking pro on this thing and really wanted to have fun moving the snow around. I assured them that I knew what I was doing and with much reluctance they let me leave on the tractor. Not after they told me a million times that if I had any problems to call them. I just had to smile, they had no idea how much time logged on this thing. I knew it better than they could despite being a girl. And I was off! I scraped out the driveway so clean and fast that I was sad that there wasn’t more to do. Andrew and I had a muscle contest with the four wheeler and the tractor. He started way back on the road and revved his engine, then shot forward ramming a pile of snow and shoved it into the snow bank. Then I started at the same spot. I lowered the front loader and charged a pile of snow. I shoved it clear up to the snow bank, lifted up the snow bank and moved the whole thing about three feet and dropped it. I think we both agreed that I won. It was such a fun day!